After assisting hundreds of people to reach and exceed their goals, I see patterns that arise. What is it that “successful” people do better than others? Several actions stand out – they quickly find perspective in any situation and they exercise their power of choice much more often than others do. Which energetic balloon do I want to reflect me most of the time? Do I believe that I can have all the energy I ever need, at this moment? Time is finite, energy is not.
Of the many thousands of daily thoughts that we have, our thoughts fall into two buckets – those that serve us and those that do not. I believe that our thoughts lead to our feelings and emotions, which then lead to our behaviors. So if we want to change our behaviors, it all starts with a thought. Being mindful of which thoughts I am serving up to myself is a great way to start the process. That involves choice!
More Choices = More Energy = More Personal and Professional Power
Will I allow this thought to hang around in my mind? Why am I thinking so much about this topic? What other thoughts could I choose?
For those thoughts that take us into avoidance, stress, conflict, struggle, worry, blame, victim, frustration, fear, resentment…i.e. thoughts that don’t serve us and make us weaker, consider asking the following questions to shift into powerful energy that serves and propels you to reach your goals:
1). How long do I want to be here?
We can hang on to resentment for a long time. We can overextend our own pity party beyond its useful life. Without being aware that we are doing it, we can find ourselves consumed with worry that begets more worry. By asking ourselves this powerful question, we make a choice to limit the de-energizing impact of these detrimental thoughts. What if we never, ever had another “bad day”? What if there were only “bad moments” because we chose to limit their duration? It is entirely up to us.
2). Would I rather be right or happy?
At first, it is an odd question to ask oneself. When we insist that certain situations are objective when in reality, they are subjective, we create stress for ourselves and those around us. Some battles are worth fighting and some are not. Exercising our choice on which battles to fight can keep us from leaking air from our energetic balloon. It preserves our energy for the most meaningful and beneficial activities.
3). What choices do I have that I might be missing?
When we are stressed, we become myopic. We can’t see the many choices and alternatives that are available to us. While this question can be tough to answer ourselves, it is a great one to ask someone who knows us well. What am I missing that is obvious to you? Where have I created limitations for myself that I can’t see beyond? Our energy increases when perspective expands and we act on any of the myriad of choices that are now apparent.
4). What might the ideal look like for my situation?
The corporate world is full of problems. We get so caught up in problems and attempting to solve them that we lose the big picture. We get accustomed to playing “small ball”, expecting problems to continue to arise, which they do. When we conceive of the ideal solution, we access a different part of our brain that allows us to create solutions, which fix problems once and for all. Our energy increases when we believe there is an answer – once and for all.
5). What am I telling myself?
“I always do this. I will never change. This always happens to me. It is just my luck. I don’t think I can do it. It’s just the way that it is.” Words have power in our lives and minds. Continuing to repeat these statements to ourselves is a great way to keep getting what we have always gotten – low energy and inability to reach our goals. When we choose to change our self-talk to allow ourselves to succeed, that is indeed what happens. Energy rises with the words of possibility, opportunity and promise that we give ourselves.